Meditation 101: Stop Wondering How to Get Started
Written by: Michele Lyman, RYT 500
“Have you tried meditation - I hear it’s really good for you!”
*CRINGE*
I’m not sure about you, but getting that question used to make me shutter. And I’ve been practicing yoga since 2000! There was no way that meditation was going to quiet this overthinking mind. Not to mention that the idea of sitting with my crazy, anxious thoughts was too scary to even consider.
That is until I realized during a required 9-day intensive meditation teacher training in 2016 (yes … that’s 16 years after starting my yoga journey) that meditating was not about quieting my mind, but more about watching my thoughts in order to change my relationship to them.
And now, I use meditation regularly to soothe my anxiety - and about 500 other things! If you are anything like I used to be, you want to keep reading! Today I’m breaking down the basics of meditation so you can understand and apply a few simple techniques to help you feel more grounded and balanced during your day, even if your time is limited.
What Is Meditation?
According to Google, and the Oxford Languages, the word meditate is defined as:
“To think deeply or focus one's mind for a period of time, in silence or with the aid of chanting, for religious or spiritual purposes or as a method of relaxation.”
So what the heck does that mean?
Many people believe you need to quiet your mind and be all “zen-like” when you meditate to help you become a “better person”. This couldn’t be any further from the truth. When you meditate, you are not trying to turn off your thoughts or feelings. Instead, the goal is to let your thoughts and feelings come in and out of your mind, just as they are, and your job is to become more aware of them without judgement.
I like to think of meditation as exercise for the mind. Just like you would go to the gym to strengthen your muscles or run to improve your cardio, you can practice meditation to “work out” your brain. The key is to practice becoming more aware of your thoughts so you can learn to better understand them. And once you better understand them, you can begin to change your relationship with them.
Self-Observation Without Judgment
Inside that brain of yours is a constant dialogue that just keeps jumping from one idea, thought or emotion to another. I call it my “monkey mind” and it’s exhausting.
If you were able to hear the thoughts in my head, they might sound something like …
“I really didn’t sleep well last night. I wonder if it was because of the full moon? Or maybe it was because of some other reason. I really should track when I don’t sleep well to figure this out. Do I have a spare journal? I will have to go to the store today to get one. But I can’t go until after my class. I wonder how many people will show up to class today? I hope Cathy comes. I would really like to see her. I need to ask her how her mom is doing ….”
Sound familiar?
I imagine you have something similar going on inside your head right now. Most people have this “monkey mind” that jumps from one thought or emotion to another. But if we step back and notice our mind’s chatter, it will create a little space for us to respond to the situation instead of reacting.
Now, if you are still asking yourself, “What is Michele talking about? I don’t have that voice inside my head”, then that’s the voice I’m talking about.
Self observation, also known as the witness, is your awareness of your own thoughts, feelings and emotions. The part of you doing the observing is your true self. When we practice self-observation using meditation techniques, we are becoming more aware of the “thinker” behind the thought. And when you become more aware of the thinker behind the thought, you create a little bit of space between your thoughts or stressors and your reaction to them. This gives you a little more time to react - instead of the situation choosing for you, you choose for yourself.
When we meditate, we are training our brains to be more self aware of our thoughts and find that space, even when we are going about our daily lives.
Benefits Of Meditation
Just like yoga, there are many different types of meditation that have been around for over 5,000 years. In Southeast Asia, they mostly practice the Buddha’s original teachings. In Japan you’ll find Zen meditation. And in Korea they are mostly focused on self inquiry.
What have we done in the west? We’ve sliced it and we’ve diced it. We’ve mapped the brain to see which parts are activated through different techniques. We’ve done double-blind studies to better understand the effects of meditation on our physical health, emotional well-being, mental clarity and intuition. And all this amazing research has proven that meditation can create a deep state of relaxation and a calmer mind because it helps to slow down your nervous system, reduce your heart rate and lower your respiration rate.
Some of the many benefits of meditation include:
Reduce stress - one of the most common reasons why people start a meditation practice.
Controls anxiety
Better focus and concentration
Increase self-esteem and self-awareness
Improve immunity
Headache and general pain relief
Improve memory
Improve sleep
Greater empathy for yourself and others
Reduce high blood pressure
Improve emotional well-being
Lengthen attention span
The practice of meditation helps you notice when you are caught in a thought or feeling. You can see the thought for what it is - just a thought - and you can return your attention to the present moment. The more you practice this skill in meditation, the more likely you’ll notice these thoughts during the day. And, once you start noticing them more often, you can return your awareness to the present moment, creating that little bit of space to decide how you want to react instead of letting the thought create a reaction for you.
The other benefit of meditation is that you start to understand the nature of your mind and your patterns of resistance. Once you can see these patterns and understand your triggers, you can engage in practices that will actually change the relationship you have with frustrating and unpleasant repeating thought patterns.
Tips For Beginning A Meditation Practice
If you are new to meditation, here are a few tips that will help as you get started.
Create a schedule. Try meditating at the same time each day to see how it impacts you. You might meditate first thing in the morning or before bed, as an example. Once you decide on the time of day that works best for you, make sure to schedule it. This will help you create a routine.
Start slow. When you first start, set a time for only 5-10 minutes a day, and then work your way up to longer sessions. You don’t want to jump into a long sit right out of the gate.
Sit comfortably. It is not recommended that you meditate lying down because you will be more likely to fall asleep. Sit on the floor with your legs crossed or underneath you, or sit in a chair with your feet on the floor so that you can elongate your spine. The key is to make sure your body is generally comfortable since you will be sitting for a length of time.
Observe without judgement. I have a teacher that always says, “Your mind is like a bad neighborhood. You don’t want to go there alone.” As you meditate, thoughts and feelings will arise that will be unpleasant. Try not to judge them. Simply recognize that your mind’s job is to think! And when you notice these thoughts simply say to yourself, “Oh, just thinking again” and gently return your awareness back to the present moment.
Use a guide. There are so many awesome meditation apps out there right now! If you find it hard to sit alone to meditate, try a guided meditation. My favorite apps are Headspace, Calm and Insight Timer. Did you hear that my crush, Matthew Mcconaughey, is on the Calm app and will guide you to fall asleep faster? Sign me up!
Types of Meditation
There are literally hundreds of different meditation techniques from a range of traditional, cultural, spiritual and religious practices. The most effective type for you will really depend on your individual needs, since the practice of meditation is truly different for everyone. And, it can even be different for you depending on the time of the day, week or year. The key is to learn a few techniques to keep in your “toolbox” and then tune in to see what your body and mind need at any given moment. Then, grab the meditation technique that will meet those specific needs.
Here are a few different types to get you started:
Body Scan and Breath-Based Meditation
Yoga-based meditation has three distinct stages of practice: focus, flow and letting Go. First, you want to concentrate your mind, which creates resilience and cultivates focus. It’s not always easy to keep your awareness on a single point - you have to return to it again and again. Over time, you begin to feel a sense of calm and relaxation. And with that, you can start to notice what is happening and changing in the moment and your relationship to it. And from there, you can explore letting go, or allowing whatever comes up to just be.
Here are the steps you can practice once you’ve found a comfortable position either on the ground or in a chair.
Breathe: Let your breath flow in and out, very easily.
Relax: Soften your muscles and let go of tension.
Body Scan: Starting at the top of the head and working your way to your feet, relax the major points of tension in the body. Relax the face, jaw, tongue, shoulders, palms, hands, belly, low back, legs, soles of the feet and heals.
Feel: Open up to all the sensations flowing through your body.
Watch: Observe this moment without grasping what feels pleasant or pushing away what feels unpleasant.
Allow: Accept your experience for exactly as it is - let go of the need to change anything.
Mantra Meditation
A mantra is a sound, word or phrase that is chanted out loud or used internally as an object of meditation. It can be more tangible - like chanting or using beads - or more subtle - like connecting a phrase in your mind that you repeat with the rhythm of your breath. If you choose to practice with a word or phrase, know that it doesn’t matter what you use. However, the phrase or word should resonate with you. And try to stay away from phrases that have strong mental associations like “money”.
Suggested phrases you can try are: “I Am”, “I am relaxed”, or “I am at peace.”
First, settle in and make yours comfortable. If it feels ok to do so, close your eyes and bring your awareness to your breath. Take a few long, deep breaths to settle in and relax.
Gentle bring the mantra into your awareness. You might want to imagine it spoken out loud and then feel it getting softer as you internalize it. At first, you may want to connect the mantra to the breath. For example, using the phrase, “I am relaxed”, as you inhale, say to yourself “I am” and as you exhale, say “relaxed”. You can keep this connection or eventually let it fade away and just notice the rhythm of the mantra.
Rather than forcing yourself to “think” the mantra, simply hold the mantra in the foreground of your awareness and release thoughts, feelings, or sensations as you become aware of them. Also know that your mind will wander! Remember - that job of the mind is to think! When that happens, gently without judgement bring yourself back to the awareness of the mantra.
Walking Meditation
Walking meditation is really beneficial for people with anxiety. The focus is to learn how to pay attention on purpose. When you are feeling anxious, your mind is distracted, scattered and unfocused. Walking meditation provides a deep level of focus and concentration, allowing you to really get absorbed in the present moment.
This type of meditation can be done anytime and at any speed. You want to be aware of the body as it moves through space and simply breathe naturally. There is a tendency to make this practice more “interesting.” Remember that it’s just walking and you want to keep it very simple. Keep your eyes cast down to avoid distractions and when you notice you are lost in thought, simply come back to movement.
There are two options for walking meditation.
Option one - count your steps. Count off each number as you take a step, beginning with one. Then count, “one, two” and then “one, two, three” and so on. Continue this until you reach ten and repeat back at one. If you lose count, simply start again at one.
Option two - movement of the feet. Label each step, breaking down the step into three distinct sections. “Lift” while lifting. “Move” while moving. “Place while placing. When your mind wanders, bring your awareness back to the labeling and awareness of the direct sensation you feel.
Loving-Kindness Meditation
I think we can all agree that our world could benefit from a bit more compassion and love. The practice of Loving-Kindness, or Metta Meditation, focuses on generating a friendly and compassionate attitude toward yourself and others. This meditation is very helpful when you find yourself in a negative loop either about yourself or about others. It’s a wonderful way to shift your mindset to gratitude and send well wishes out into the world.
Traditionally, you would offer loving-kindness in the following way:
Yourself
A mentor - someone you admire and respect
A friend - Someone you love
A neutral person - a retail store clerk or your mailman
Someone who challenges you
All beings
As you bring these people to mind, one at a time, you can repeat the following statements either out loud or to yourself:
May I/you be safe
May I/you be happy
May I/you be healthy
May I/you live with ease
Feel free to experiment with any phrases that resonate for you.
So there you have it! You now know the basics of how a meditation practice can help improve your overall well-being without taking up too much time in your day! Take it from me - meditating can be challenging! AND, it’s benefits will also have you feeling more freedom from your overactive mind so that you can start to live the life you deserve.